An October Pep Talk
A little bit check in, a little bit lament, a little bit inspiration
It’s October and that means I’ve entered a state of disillusionment.
Not entirely, just a little bit.
Maybe you’re also experiencing some disillusionment.
This is my 23rd year of teaching but only my 6th year in a classroom setting and I still forget that this happens in October.
When I first started teaching, the mentor program shared Ellen Moir’s Phases of First-Year Teaching. It’s graph that shows the rollercoaster ride of emotions a first year teacher experiences.
I am here to say that even an experienced teacher feels these emotions. The feelings aren’t as intense and I’m finding myself knowing what resources to call upon or how to navigate them better. But they’re still very real.
In August, the feeling is anticipation for the new school year.
Then September is about survival. I shared strategies for staying grounded during re-entry because it’s truly such an intense shift from summer to school.
Which brings us to October, November, and December where we sink into disillusionment.
As a new teacher, I think disillusionment is the time when one might wonder if teaching is the job for them. When one wakes up and wonders, “Is this job really for me?”
The definition of disillusionment is: a feeling of disappointment resulting from the discovery that something is not as good as one believed it to be. I don’t question whether I’m cut out for teaching. I know without a doubt that teaching is what I’m supposed to be doing.
But I do have to say that things get real in October. Things have been busy. I coached volleyball, the grading picked up, we had open house and parent-teacher conferences, and now I’m noticing some students pushing boundaries which requires me to show up differently.
I’m reminding myself that this is teaching. This is part of the rollercoaster ride that is the school year. I shouldn’t be surprised by it, but I climb into a rollercoaster knowing the giant drop awaits me and it still takes my breath away. Just because I know it’s coming doesn’t mean I don’t still grab the handlebar and scream as we take a 70 mph plunge.
Which brings me to the pep talk part.
I share all this because you might be feeling what I’m feeling. If you are, you aren’t alone. I feel it too.
My advice is to continue to practice self care and you might use the writing ideas I shared in my re-entry post to do that. Another idea is to write out your values and beliefs about teaching and revisit ways you live them in your classroom. You might want to reset classroom expectations and check in with how your students are doing.
This is not a time to do more. It is a time to stay the course.
Take it one day at a time. Be kind to yourself. Know that this is an intense time of year. Pause and rest. Reset if you need to. Trust that you are on your way to winter break and then January will bring a time of rejuvenation until the end of the year when you’ll be able to reflect on all you have done and look forward to the next year with anticipation.
If you have other ways you ride the rollercoaster of emotions this time of year, I’d love to hear them! Please share in the comments what has worked for you in the past or is working for you this school year. Bring on the wisdom!